Last week I re-read a trade paperback of Howard the Duck. The first story is a hilarious, biting satire on corporations–and boy bands!–and was also pretty raunchy and outrageous. The rest of the collection fell a bit short of this one story, and while I can’t say the entire collection paid off, it’s definitely different. Not sure that I would recommend buying it, but if you happen to come across a copy, it might be worth an hour just for something you would never normally read.Last week I re-read a trade paperback of Howard the Duck. The first story is a hilarious, biting satire on corporations–and boy bands!–and was also pretty raunchy and outrageous. The rest of the collection fell a bit short of this one story, and while I can’t say the entire collection paid off, it’s definitely different. Not sure that I would recommend buying it, but if you happen to come across a copy, it might be worth an hour just for something you would never normally read.

Finally saw Old Country for Old Men, and it’s pretty close to being a great, great movie. And it would have been had it not been for the last 20 minutes.

Up until then, it’s a tense, mesmerizing crime movie that had my heart pounding throughout. I was totally into this movie. So for an hour and a half, I was loving it. And then … the story shifts gears in such a bizarre fashion that it was like they decided to end the movie before it was finished, and wrap up with some other story that haFinally saw Old Country for Old Men, and it’s pretty close to being a great, great movie. And it would have been had it not been for the last 20 minutes.

Up until then, it’s a tense, mesmerizing crime movie that had my heart pounding throughout. I was totally into this movie. So for an hour and a half, I was loving it. And then … the story shifts gears in such a bizarre fashion that it was like they decided to end the movie before it was finished, and wrap up with some other story that has almost nothing to do with the movie you’ve been watching all along.

It’s a head scratcher.

So without giving anything away for those of you who haven’t seen it, be prepared for 90 minutes of greatness, and then 20 minutes of [i]wait … what?[/i]

I was talking to someone yesterday who said that the book is exactly the same way, and while I can appreciate a faith adaption, if the story doesn’t play out, it’s time to make a few adjustments. If only.

Post edited by: rcolchamiro, at: 2007/12/11 06:37

Last night I was at my company’s holiday party, and I think it’s fair to say that I had my share of cocktails. Yep. I was pretty much loaded.

On the subway ride home I had the warm tingle that only alcohol can bring, and so I was feeling flippy and fun. And so I thought, [i]I know, let me edit pages from my book![/i]

I know, I know, probably not the best time to be doing careful line editing, but, hey, there’s really no logic quite like drunk logic. It has a sensibility all it’s own. SLast night I was at my company’s holiday party, and I think it’s fair to say that I had my share of cocktails. Yep. I was pretty much loaded.

On the subway ride home I had the warm tingle that only alcohol can bring, and so I was feeling flippy and fun. And so I thought, [i]I know, let me edit pages from my book![/i]

I know, I know, probably not the best time to be doing careful line editing, but, hey, there’s really no logic quite like drunk logic. It has a sensibility all it’s own. So there I was on the F train headed into Queens, riding along with a combination of tequila and beer coursing through me, reading pages from a section of my book that takes place in Amsterdam. How appropriate.

Thing is, having looked at the pages this morning, the line editing is pretty good. The cuts I made were reasonable and on point. The physical lines I drew with the pen, however, are something less than on point. They’re kinda … squiggly. Not too straight.

So, if there’s a lesson to be learned, it’s not that you can’t make good editing decisions while blasted, it’s that making good editing [i]marks[/i] is slightly more complicated and might be better held until the next day.

Well, today’s the next day … and I’ve got some lines to straighten out.

Post edited by: rcolchamiro, at: 2007/12/13 20:30

It?s that time of year again. The holiday parties are kicking up into gear.

Last night Liz and I went to her company?s holiday party at this swanked out restaurant in Midtown Manhattan. It was a small party?maybe 20 people?with drinks and then a five-course meal. It was pretty darn nice.

My company holiday party is Monday, and another holiday I was planning to go to last night got postponed until January.

But the holiday party is a funny thing. Sometimes they?re actually really,It?s that time of year again. The holiday parties are kicking up into gear.

Last night Liz and I went to her company?s holiday party at this swanked out restaurant in Midtown Manhattan. It was a small party?maybe 20 people?with drinks and then a five-course meal. It was pretty darn nice.

My company holiday party is Monday, and another holiday I was planning to go to last night got postponed until January.

But the holiday party is a funny thing. Sometimes they?re actually really, really fun. Sometimes the vibe is just right, with the holiday decorations and the holiday spirit?and lots of alcohol. But when you get those good holiday parties, it sorta restores my faith in people, in us [i]as[/i] a people. It reminds me of the generosity of spirit we can have.

On the other hand, there?s nothing quite as crappy as a crappy holiday party. When nobody really wants to be there, when the mood is dour, the food is bad, when the drinks are watered down. I?d much rather be huddled up on the couch watching a good movie then suffering a lousy holiday party. Hopefully, I won?t have to, but you never know. These things can be pretty random.

But last night was fun, which puts me 1 for 1 this year. Let?s hope the streak continues.

Anyway, not a long blog today, but I had holiday parties on my mind, and I figured I?d put some festive holiday party thoughts into the ether, hoping they make their way over to wherever you are.

OK. So I lied. A big honkin? lie.

Well, it wasn?t so much that I lied, but that it turns out I was dead wrong. Very, very wrong. And I?m very happy about that.

In my last blog I wrote about how I?m re-reading Finders Keepers, trying to trim it down to size so that it will be more publisher friendly. In particular, I wrote about how painful it is to now go back and re-cut what I already thought was a tight, clean manuscript, and how I hate getting rid of words. I?m a writer. Writer?s wrOK. So I lied. A big honkin? lie.

Well, it wasn?t so much that I lied, but that it turns out I was dead wrong. Very, very wrong. And I?m very happy about that.

In my last blog I wrote about how I?m re-reading Finders Keepers, trying to trim it down to size so that it will be more publisher friendly. In particular, I wrote about how painful it is to now go back and re-cut what I already thought was a tight, clean manuscript, and how I hate getting rid of words. I?m a writer. Writer?s write. We hate to cut. We [i]hate[/i] to cut.

Well, I started making my cuts the other day, and it turns out … I love it.

Seriously. Love it, love it, love it.

By taking another look at Finders Keepers, by taking a very close look, I?m forcing myself to get rid of every last word I don?t need. And it hasn?t been nearly as tough as I thought. I?m not even cutting away big pieces either. It?s just a few words here, a few words there. Since Finders Keepers has 100 chapters, I?m reading them (out of order), looking to cut about 100 words a chapter. At that rate, I?ll cut about 10,000 words, and nothing major will need to go, and I?ll get Finders Keepers down to about 117,000 words total (from 127,000 words, where it is now). Getting to 117,000 would be a really nice accomplishment. I?d love to get down to 110,000, but that might be tough.

Now, these targets are a little arbitrary. Industry standard is that 120,000 is pretty much an acceptable maximum for first novels, so that’s my benchmark. But every word that I can come under 120,000 will help–just so long as it doesn’t hurt the story. And don’t worry, Finders Keepers will be sharp and zany as every. Just a little bit tighter. And that’s only a good thing.

At this point, I don?t think I?m averaging 100 words a chapter, though. Maybe a bit less. Maybe around 75. But still, that?s 7,500 words total. And that?s not bad. Plus, I only just started a few days ago. Who knows what I?ll discover? Maybe I?ll find that a particular chapter isn?t even necessary, or that I just overdid it in one section or another. Either way, I?m snipping away, and finding it really satisfying. It?s like a sculpture that needs very light, very subtle chiseling to smooth out the rough edges. But since it?s a large sculpture, there are many small rough edges.

My guess is that it will take me about another two weeks to finish the chiseling, and then another week to implement the changes and do a new word count. Then I?ll see where I?m at.

I admit it. I was wrong. I thought I would hate having cut this much, but as it turns out, it?s a great thing indeed.

As great as Johan Santana is, as much as I’d love for him to be the anchor of the Yankees pitching staff, I’m starting to feel that Phil Hughes, Melky Cabrera and another prospects is just too much to give up, not including the enormous salary he’ll command.

It’s a tough call. One the one hand, Santana is just the best. He’s an incredible pitcher who makes any team instantly much, much better. Way better. He’s fierce.

But at what point is even he not worth it?

We’ll see …As great as Johan Santana is, as much as I’d love for him to be the anchor of the Yankees pitching staff, I’m starting to feel that Phil Hughes, Melky Cabrera and another prospects is just too much to give up, not including the enormous salary he’ll command.

It’s a tough call. One the one hand, Santana is just the best. He’s an incredible pitcher who makes any team instantly much, much better. Way better. He’s fierce.

But at what point is even he not worth it?

We’ll see …

I new this day was coming. It was inevitable. And that day is here.

When I finished writing [i]Finders Keepers[/i], when I wrote, edited, re-edited, cut, trimmed and snipped, I said to myself, [i]Okay. This baby is tight and lean. I?ve trimmed all the fat. All meat[/i].

And yet it still came in at about 127,000 words. That?s not outrageous, but it?s on the longer side for a novel, and especially for a first novel. Not because it?s wrong, but because publishers are, on average, less lI new this day was coming. It was inevitable. And that day is here.

When I finished writing [i]Finders Keepers[/i], when I wrote, edited, re-edited, cut, trimmed and snipped, I said to myself, [i]Okay. This baby is tight and lean. I?ve trimmed all the fat. All meat[/i].

And yet it still came in at about 127,000 words. That?s not outrageous, but it?s on the longer side for a novel, and especially for a first novel. Not because it?s wrong, but because publishers are, on average, less likely to give more pages to a first-time novelist.

That said, a story needs to be as long as it needs to be, and so I weighed that against keeping it as short as possible. And when I was done, I felt the manuscript was at its proper length. And yet I always just assumed that either an agent, an editor or a publisher would say, [i]okay, we need to tweak this a bit, take a little off the edges.[/i]

Well, this where I?m at.

As I get closer to the publishing stage, I have to face the reality that 127,000 words really is on the longer side?not the wrong side, but longer side?and now it?s time to do something about that. So over the next few weeks I?m going to be taking a very close look at the manuscript, and will trim and tweak and prune every last word that just doesn?t need to be there.

Writers write. It?s what we do. Adding words is fun. Cutting words is not. But ultimately, cutting is needed. Having a lean, tight manuscript ultimately is what?s best for the story, and I will be as ruthless as I can muster. And while deep in my mind I know I need to do this, it won?t be easy.

And I?ll hate every minute of it.

Post edited by: rcolchamiro, at: 2007/12/13 20:32

Post edited by: rcolchamiro, at: 2008/01/04 05:44

For the Steve Carrell fans out there, Dan in Real Life is another winner. It’s not off the wall like 40-Year Old Virgin, or subtly twisted like The Office. Dan in Real Life, on paper, is just a boy meets girl kinda movie for adults. It’s about a guy who writes an advice column, who is also a father of three girls whose wife died about 4 years earlier, and hasn’t really moved on. But he goes to his family’s house for a weekend respite up in Rhode Island, and randomly meets a woman, and then suddeFor the Steve Carrell fans out there, Dan in Real Life is another winner. It’s not off the wall like 40-Year Old Virgin, or subtly twisted like The Office. Dan in Real Life, on paper, is just a boy meets girl kinda movie for adults. It’s about a guy who writes an advice column, who is also a father of three girls whose wife died about 4 years earlier, and hasn’t really moved on. But he goes to his family’s house for a weekend respite up in Rhode Island, and randomly meets a woman, and then suddenly he finds himself looking at things a bit differently, especially as nothing goes quite right for him.

Dan in Real Life is funny throughout, has heart, and while it could very easily be a standard studio movie, it’s shot like an idie movie with an indie vibe, and it pays off. You may see the ending coming, but it doesn’t really matter, as it’s an hour and forty-five minutes well spent. I’m not saying you need to spend the $10.50 to see it, but it’s a rental for sure.

I?m a real big believer in the squeezy stress ball. Oh, am I ever. I just love those things. I?ve got a green one, a blue and a red one. Two are at work, one is at home. Does that mean that I?m full of stress? Well, some people would say that I?m certainly full of something, but I admit that stress is at least somewhere on the list.

Now, the ironic thing about my stress balls is that I CAN?T FIND THEM! AND I NEED THEM!

I?m okay, I?m … o-kay … I?m o …. kaaaaay ……

Breathe I?m a real big believer in the squeezy stress ball. Oh, am I ever. I just love those things. I?ve got a green one, a blue and a red one. Two are at work, one is at home. Does that mean that I?m full of stress? Well, some people would say that I?m certainly full of something, but I admit that stress is at least somewhere on the list.

Now, the ironic thing about my stress balls is that I CAN?T FIND THEM! AND I NEED THEM!

I?m okay, I?m … o-kay … I?m o …. kaaaaay ……

Breathe … breathe ……… breathe ……………..

Ahhhhhhhhhhh ……..

Thinking I was being all smart and clever and keeping myself in good stead at home, I placed my squeezy stress ball right where I can find it, but also well placed so that it?s not in the way. And as soon as I remember where that is, I?ll be a happy man.

The work stress ball is another matter, and, I have to confess, a product of my own doing. I?ll explain.

I tend to walk around the office with the squeezy stress ball, to a) relieve stress, but also b), to keep the fingers flexing on my right hand, as I’ve got kind of carpel pinkie thingy going on because of how I sit and my hand rests on the desk. So the stress ball is of great relief to me. Now, I?ve also been known to stand behind and hover over one of the junior writers I supervise, bouncing the stress ball on the floor behind him in a [i]thum .. thum … thum … [/i]kind of way. It?s just a ha-ha he-he thing; a little work/overlord humor.

Well, this junior writer, who shall remain nameless, has since transferred back home to the Albany area, where he now works for us remotely. So for his last day I played a little going away prank on him. Any time he got up to go to the bathroom, get coffee or take lunch, I quickly snatched his mouse and phone receiver and planted them throughout the office.

He then would arrive back at his desk, confused?a deer in headlights. He would laugh, accuse me of being the culprit (the nerve of that guy!), and then find replacement parts somewhere in the office. And then when he?d get up again, I?d snatch the replacements. And so the day went. A good laugh was had by all (especially me).

Well, in the spirit of [i]paybacks are a bitch[/i], before he left for Albany, said junior writer managed to pilfer my squeezy stress ball and hide it on me somewhere in the office, and of course I?m too proud to admit (to him) that I miss it. Lucky for me I also have a tennis ball on my desk, which is filling in adequately, but it?s just not the same. Plus my ego hates that he got me back. Meanwhile, I?m checking all the draws and cabinets (with no luck so far).

If there?s a lesson to be learned here it probably has something to do with what?s the good for the goose and all that jazz, but mostly it?s that losing my balls is stressful indeed.

Now that the Thanksgiving break is over and we’ve all had a chance to gorge ourselves on turkey and stuffing all things gobblicious, there’s one more big wave this year.

I know there’s all sorts of pressure around the holidays, to be with family, to do our holiday shopping, but I always love this time of year because, despite the demands on our time, it’s also a period of respite. Of gathering in our warm houses while it’s cold outside, of getting and giving gifts, of sweet snacks … and tNow that the Thanksgiving break is over and we’ve all had a chance to gorge ourselves on turkey and stuffing all things gobblicious, there’s one more big wave this year.

I know there’s all sorts of pressure around the holidays, to be with family, to do our holiday shopping, but I always love this time of year because, despite the demands on our time, it’s also a period of respite. Of gathering in our warm houses while it’s cold outside, of getting and giving gifts, of sweet snacks … and time off from work, which gets me particularly excited.

When I think of the winter holidays I think of the Christmas Tree in Rockefeller Center, of snow in Central Park. I think of blankets on the couch while a movie is playing, bundled up in sweaters, feeling cozy and snug.

It’s also a time for me to recharge after a long year. A time to reflect on the year gone by, and plan for the year ahead. I know we’re not quite there yet, that it’s not even December, but it’s close, and it’s 6:20 a.m. and it’s still dark outside, the first day back to work after Thanksgiving, and it’s cold and rainy again here in Queens, so it’s comforting to be nicely tucked away in my apartment, at my desk, clacking away on these keys.

I’m not even quite sure what I’m trying to say here, as I feel caught between worlds right now, between what has just been and what will soon be. I suppose every moment is actually like that, as we never really know what’s going to happen next, but I’m feeling a bit … I don’t know … transient right now, as if one phase of my life is ending and another is just beginning.

Every moment is another opportunity for something new. I’m not sure what’s coming next, but I’m pretty jazzed to find out what it will be. And as always, when I find out what that is, I’ll keep you posted.

Post edited by: rcolchamiro, at: 2007/11/26 06:29